New year’s resolutions are often great examples of this type of struggle
To frame your thinking, we will use an iceberg as a metaphor. As you probably aware, a small portion of an iceberg – approximately 10 percent – is above the waterline, with the bulk of the iceberg submerged below the waterline. Human beings are much like icebergs in that, at any moment, there are only a small fraction of our thoughts, emotions and physical sensations that we are aware of – above our waterline of consciousness.
Intentions above or below the waterline?
Using the iceberg metaphor where do you think intentions fall: above the waterline or below?
if you think about it, you will realize that intentions fall both above and below the waterline.
What this means is that we have intentions that we are aware of – stated intentions – and those of which we are not aware – hidden intentions.
Often, the stated intentions which I am aware of are in conflict with intentions that I am unaware of.
Example of conflicting intentions
A common new New Year’s resolution is to lose weight.
When I ask people during our first meeting to answer by YES/NO for the following: “Do you think you’re overweight?”
Typically I get a YES.
Answer this question: Do You Consider Yourself Overweight?
If your answer is yes, then you have conflicting intentions. At the 10 percent level, you intend to reach the ideal weight, but at the 90 percent level, you have different hidden intentions.
The Hidden Intentions
When I ask them to list some of the hidden intentions I get the following:
– I like to eat and don’t want to give up the enjoyment of food
– I don’t want to get out of my warm bed to run in cold weather
– I don’t want to expend effort
– I don’t see myself at that weight; I’ve always been heavy
– There is not enough time
Be Stronger Than Your Hidden Intentions
Technically these reasons are the manifestation of deeper intentions, like the desire for comfort, satisfaction, relaxation, entitlement and so on.
The point is that often hidden intentions exist below the waterline and conflict with our stated intentions, so we struggle to keep our commitments and following through on our intentions.
Successful commitment occurs when your stated intentions are stronger that your hidden intentions, or when you consciously reconcile the conflict.
Cheers for a Healthy Lifestyle,
Coach Fares.
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